Alfa Romeo Spider 2.2 Selespeed Review

That is because the Alfa Romeo Spider is undeniably one of the most gorgeous cars on the road. And if you think otherwise, you might be better off reading a review on shopping trolleys or push-carts.

The Spider, penned by one of the best names in the design industry, Giorgetto Giugiaro, is manufactured by another unmistakable big name - Pinifarina. Unarguably, any car drawn up with the combined efforts of those two has to be good.

Take a walk around it and the visual cues will make you drool.

Successor to its older model, the Spider 916, the flowing lines are a lot less intricate now, and the result is an entirely different looking car. In a very good way though.

Based on the Alfa Romeo Brera, it is resplendent, but not gaudy. Place it alongside a Ferrari or an Aston Martin and it will not look out of place at all.

Mind you, this is a S$180,000 car, a mere fraction of what the usual line-up of exotics would cost.

Half an orgasm

Unfortunately, it also has a mere fraction of their engine size and performance.

With its 2.2-litre JTS inline-four engine, it won't exactly do its looks much justice; completing its zero-to-hundred in 8.8 seconds (Selespeed transmission), a rather lacking output of 185 hp at 6,500 rpm and 230 Nm of torque is insufficient of allowing you to leave the traffic lights in a huge cloud of tire smoke.

However, if you take the 3.2 V6 version, 260 hp, 322 Nm and a manual gearbox will get you mail, with a logo of the Traffic Police Department on the envelope, in 6.8 seconds.

Get inside the hot seat and you will be greeted by a lovely instrument cluster, shaded by its carefully outlined housing which resembles a lady's bosom wrapped in a corset. And then there's the three circular air-con vents, neatly stacked above three gauges by the names of Olio, Acqua and Benzina.

It is this minutiae which tickle and tease one's senses and adds to the whole spine-tingling excitement of just being inside an Alfa.

However, push the start button to spin up its four-pot and you might be slightly disappointed. Sedately and rather lazily, the needle on the tachometer hops to slightly over 2,000 rpm, engine producing a muffled woof before it settles down to a muted idle. Barely an adrenaline-pumping experience.

I looked down at the gear-knob and the feeling could be best described as this - when you meet an extremely beautiful lady who has the finest features and come-hither curves, only to discover that, when you look down, "she" has a knob, too.

Slow and uncomfortably jerky unless you make an effort to lift off at precisely the right moment, the six-speed Selespeed transmission has to be the bane of all that is glorious about this car. If you are intending to buy one, opt for the manual. After all, you are piloting an Alfa and Alfas are predominantly driven by people who really love cars and driving.

Traditionalist Exhibitionist

And this is one cabriolet which will make you want to drive mostly with its top down, for a few reasons. Firstly, it looks better that way, as if it were designed to go around topless and that the roof was only if you needed shelter from the rain or harsh sun. Secondly, because you probably would need the headroom, thanks to the seats which are positioned somewhat higher than comfortable.

Turn its nicely-weighted steering when attacking a series of bends, notice the sharp-ish response, feel the body roll, with a tiny hint of understeer accompanied by delectable amounts of grip.

The Italian dances around winding tarmac like with some grace more than it darts across them. However, truth to be told, nobody will be looking at the car, exclaiming about its body roll rather than about its beauty.

And it won't squeak about as much as one normally imagines Alfa Romeos would, even though removing the roof spells disaster for structural rigidity.

But to be fair, everything is forgivable. Even the absolutely genius idea of hiding the boot-release button inside the centre-armrest compartment. No one looks at Angelina Jolie and says "Oh your lips are not of the Golden Ratio to your mouth".

And anyone who does ought to be shot.

The Alfa Romeo Spider is without any doubt, the most exquisite and ravishing cabriolet in its price range. Never mind the lack of power, forget its roly-polyness and throw your complains about its offset driving position out the window - because you would be driving it with the roof and the window down.